Reason for my blog title is because... I had no idea what to put as my blog title. I've got a friggin' empty brain so suck it. So its thursday..(yeah like you guys don't know that) So far, we had 3 days of orientation. I miss orientation now, really don't want to study T_T but i guess fantasies never last. I'm already confused about what we have to bring to school again. As usual, i never bother to write down my homework and listen in class. I've realized that this does not help me in any way at all. everyone's talking about homework and i'm sitting there like a noob saying "wait wait we had homework?!!?!?" /:
My science teacher gave us this contract to sign. The rules of the science lab or something. My dad has to sign it too but he's in china and i told her that. she asked me about my mum. then i said "she's not my mum" .... i swear i think i just fucking died there in my seat. hah, the kid with no mum.. no dude. i've got a fucking mum.. she's just not living with me. then in the bus, when we were dropped off, i saw all the parents waiting for their kids. i know i'm old enough to be going home alone. i know. but i want family love too okay.. why else do you think that if i list you as a sibling on fb, i fucking mean it? you think being alone is okay? no. its not. it sucks. it sucks shit. People out there saying that they're not loved because they had a quarrel with the person that they're dating should just go fucking jump off a building. You people have parents, family love. 2 parents living in your goddamn house. People to greet you when you come back home. me? I come back home and lock myself in my room for the day. oh i live such a good life huh? i get to play com 24/7 and have all the freedom i want. you think thats all there is to life? You might as well go and be a zombie. even though i have a stepmum, it just won't feel the same. i won't hug her, i won't call her "mum". she's more like a friend to me. she always has, always will. and get this, i will never, accept her as my mother. no i'm not trying to be mean. but think whatever you want. yeah think that i'm a fucking bitch. try putting yourself in my shoes for once. what if your mum leaves you then another woman comes. do you understand that fucking awkwardness? you know how fucking weird it was for me? to see a fucking stranger with my dad. a fucking stranger with my mum. do you fucking understand? when my mum used to have a boyfriend, this weird dude came to my house every weekend and slept in the same room that my dad used to sleep in. i had to call him "dad' You think i felt good about it? I felt like shouting to that person "You're not my fucking dad so get out." But no, i coudn't. I had to think for my mum. Do you people even know how fucking annoying it is to be sandwiched inbetween your parents? oh and i want to clear things up. I'm not trying to make you all sympathize with me and say "oh this girl is so pitiful" NO goddamit. I'm not trying to act like someone i'm not. So stop it with all your rumors and gossips that all you stuck up bitches say about me. fyi, if you guys don't know what "pouring your heart out means" THIS is what it means. really can't fucking stand you bitches dissing me for the wrong reason. is your life really that boring? sad, sad life.
okay i've gone off point now and i really don't feel like saying anything anymore. Had gongcha bbt today! :D I've realized that if you drink bbt, it makes you super duper full. i shall try to drink bbt everyday! my dieting is going down the drain. ate a sandwich today T_T and i ate lunch.
okay shall end my wordy post here. bye.
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